IN ONE SHORT MOMENT
Gun shot
He drops
Mother's heart stops.
Girl lied
He died.
Family cries
Friends question why.
It is a mystery to me how her mind works
How can so much darkness in one mind lurk?
"I decided to let him die" to me she said
"I pushed him into it." I listened with dread.
"He loved me dearly." Laughing she said
"And over me he shot himself and now is dead."
From me, his mother, she wanted to know
What did his head look like, at what angle did the bullet go.
With this power over life and death, her voice was aglow.
Was I breathing, my heart still beating after her verbal blow.
His last request: Love her, be kind to her is all that I ask.
Sweet, sweet child, I cannot. It is far, far too hard a task.
Later she calls and says "I did nothing wrong.
He wanted to go. I just helped him along."
How do I handle this? How do I deal with this rage?
I guess that I can't. I walk around in a daze.
Around his memory I want no one to resent
Respecting his last request, I have no way to vent.
I am like a wild beast caged in torment.
So I will think instead of the days we spent in the sun
Laughter filled the air, we all had such fun.
And although it was over almost before it had begun
We had wonderful, beautiful years together my dear son.
Some memories of you never fail to make me smile
When you sang I would stand outside your door and listen awhile.
Of all the people I've hear sing you definitely had your own style.
I smiled as I listened. Your songs will not make many girls swoon
Though sung with passion and conviction they were sung out of tune.
Now your songs are over. For me they ended too soon.
Much, much too soon.
Written by Christian's mother, Linda DuBos, February 14, 2010
ONE OF OUR DAYS IN THE SUN
A Day Spent at our Lake Property in Washington State
August 2009
Precious Little "P, our four year old granddaughter
Persephone (wearing a dress her Nana made for her).
Just hanging out in front of the camper, having some liquid
refreshment, and kicking back
(Tiffany T. - the girlfriend, Christian, daughter Robyn, and son-in-law Matt behind Robyn)
My son, Christian
Christian, Robyn, Matt, daughter Tiffany, and Persephone (in another outfit I made for her)
Relaxing by the Lake
Robyn and Persephone search for the perfect stones to skip across the lake
Tiffany stretching before her swim across the lake. Not!
Christian - just checking things out and thinking
Matt and Robyn skipping stones
THIS DAY HOLDS A WARM, SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART.
your children are very, very lucky to have you Linda. i cried for you when I read the last message. how do you endure such heartache and loss?? I already know the answer to that question. the love you have for your family would be your saviour and get you through each day. thank you for sharing your thoughts with me Linda. although it is a terrible and tragic event, and an unimaginable loss that you write about, the way you talk is also very inspiring. if your children have inherited your wisdom, then they are blessed and have a distinct advantage in life... thank you again Linda. i sincerely wish that i could take your pain away in some way but as you and i both know, nothing can do that!!!! Take care of yourself and i am also here for you my friend, always, Tony
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